Clean Jokes

storiesbyJoyce asked:

Joyce and her brother Casey read some jokes from……. Biggest Riddle Book in the World by Joseph Rosenbloom Revolting Jokes for Kids by Bounty Books

snow kid asked:


An old man and woman were married for years even though they hated each other. When they had a confrontation, screams and yelling could be heard deep into the night. A constant statement was heard by the neighbors who feared the man the most.

“When I die I will dig my way up and out of the grave to come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!”

They believed he practiced black magic and was responsible for missing cats and dogs, and strange sounds at all hours. He was feared and enjoyed the respect it garnished.

He died abruptly under strange circumstances and the funeral had a closed casket. After the burial, the wife went straight to the local bar and began to party as if there was no tomorrow.
The gaiety of her actions were becoming extreme while her neighbors approached in a group to ask these questions: Are you not afraid? Concerned? Worried? that this man who practiced black magic and stated when he died he would dig his way up and out of the grave to come back and haunt you for the rest of your life?

The wife put down her drink and said, “Let the jerk dig. I had him buried upside down.”

GIMME A STAR!!if you like it,…

ya can also add me to ya contacts..i post jokes evryday..

sweetvssexy84 asked:


how to deal? especially I feel nervous and smomach in knots and nervous. what to do? how to deal? what to say to get pay back? No jokes and thanks

charliebwoyo100470 asked:

Alan Charles Live at Croydon Hilton

pkteemax asked:

My father Minister Walter Maxwell the MC of a concert at the Poconos CoC

There is a hidden way to learn how to be funnier. The primary thing we should do is understand why we find something hilarious, at least the way recognized scientists tell it is. At times when we comprehend new stuff, the mind builds the new path, from a neuron to another neuron.

This path is called a synapse and this is an example of the ways it works:

While thinking about food, if we think of, let’s say, blueberries our brain will make a route (the synapse which will get thicker), connecting the two neural cells that contain the data we have on food and that fruit. So, the next time you think about food, you’ll surely be thinking about apples, as well. What you’re probably thinking is that this has nothing to do with humor. Well you’re wrong, as this is in fact the way humor works.

It all begins with a person telling you a simple and short story. Stand-up comedians call this a setup. After this, you should be thinking about this story in a certain way. And then, your brain will create connection, leading from this setup to a suitable punch-line. Now, you probably won’t hear the same punch-line that you thought of, but a different one, instead and it will make you laugh. Most of the people don’t understand this right away, but the next example will surely explain it better.

The Setup:

What is the most satisfying thing next to being shot at and missed?

The Punch-line:

An income tax refund.

What did you think when you heard the setup? I am sure you have thought that the car is being driven by one of the three people. It’s normal to think that way, as that is just the way our brain was made to work. And as I said, the punch-line was totally different than you expected. This is in fact the main principle of the way humor works.

A good setup is of great importance. Good comedians will always have a setup that only delivers the basic facts, so that there are many possible punch-lines you can think of. Now, the more you believe your punch-line is the best one, the more you’ll laugh when you hear the real one. But if you’re already familiar with the punch-line the joke won’t be funny anymore as the brain won’t be making any new routes.

This article should be handy in case you want to create new jokes. When a man tells something that all the people thinks about in the same way, but you figure out an unexpected way to understand it. Now, if you tell this to others, it should be funny.



By: petar1980

About the Author:

Theater Geek asked:


The jokes I read of people’s on here were either corny or bad. The person who can give me their best joke will be chosen as the best answer. Make me laugh!